The BS of “Limiting Beliefs”

So much of the time when I see a therapist saying they charge a certain amount or make a certain amount and don’t want or need to go above that, or they don’t think they can, people jump in and say “that’s just a limiting belief; charge your worth; you can make as much as you want” blah blah blah.But I’m calling BS on that, and if that’s your immediate, go-to response (saying something like that to other therapists) you need to back up and look at reality.

Someone wanting to achieve “less” than what someone else deems as “worthy”, is not a “limiting belief”.

Crazy thought here…maybe they just have different goals. Maybe they have different boundaries. Maybe they have a different willingness to do certain things personally and professionally.

That doesn’t automatically mean they’re limiting themselves…oftentimes it actually means they’re far more aware of those goals, boundaries, and their willingness, and know how to properly make choices around all of it, instead of chasing some arbitrary version of success just because social media, boss babe influencers, and coaches who coach coaches to coach coaches are telling them to.

A lot of people say “I can’t” when they mean “I won’t”.

I won’t sacrifice more time with my family than I absolutely have to.

I won’t trade my personal goals in for some extra money every month.

I won’t work more than X number of hours every week.

I won’t take on more than I’m capable of giving my all to.

I won’t hate my job.

Are limiting beliefs a thing? Yeah, sure. But the phrase is all-too-often used as some pretentious accusation toward anyone not reaching for some huge audacious goal “worthy” of some self help guru.

Know your own goals, boundaries, and willingness to do certain things.

And know if it’s really an “I can’t” or an “I won’t”?
Because a lot of the time it’s simply an “I won’t”.

Now, sometimes it absolutely is an “I can’t” and that can also be based in reality, not a ‘limiting belief’. I’ve seen people say that everyone can and should charge $100 or $150 an hour, or whatever other arbitrary number they pull out of thin air. And guess what…those same people have usually never lived anywhere that that’s not actually possible. Because if they had, they’d understand the difference in regional demographics.

$150 an hour or even much higher can be totally normal in a metropolitan area with a population of 600,000 and a median household income of half a million dollars. Or just any of the vast areas where the income and cost of living is relatively high. Yeah, you should be charging that. But here in a little ol’ town like, I don’t know, Tazewell, TN near me with a population of a whopping 2,300 and a median income of $37,000 a year, you would go out of business fast with those prices. Because you’re essentially asking someone to pay a full day or a full 2 days of their wages for a 1-hour service. So no, not everyone CAN charge those certain high amounts.

And yes, I get fired up about this, because I consult with rural therapists all the time who are belittled by people who have zero understanding of their area, the demographics, and the capabilities within it, and they’ve been convinced they’re doing something wrong because the regular Joe Blow, blue collar workers won’t pay these high prices. When in fact, they can’t afford to, and their specific area simply doesn’t have enough of a population who makes enough money to do so, to support a full client load for a massage business. So they either have to move their business elsewhere or cater to the demographics that are actually available in the area. That’s their options.

That’s why knowing your OWN numbers and what YOU actually need to make based on YOUR cost of living, YOUR bills, and YOUR goals, is so important. Because all the figures you see thrown around on social media and random business advice across the internet…it’s all arbitrary. You’ve got to figure out your own needs. And people have to stop throwing around random numbers like they mean something to EVERYONE when they absolutely do not.

If you want to figure out what you can and should charge, I’ve got a free pricing calculator, I’ve got a spreadsheet that can help you run all kinds of other metrics to get to know your business a whole lot better so you can make wiser decisions, and I’ve got a Know Your Numbers class to dig even deeper into the financials and metrics of running a successful massage business; and you know…actually figuring out how it all works for your specific situation.

I hope this gives hope to those of you who’ve been confused by all the numbers you may see floating around, and maybe a different perspective to those of you who’ve jumped on the limiting beliefs accusatory bandwagon without fully knowing someone’s situation.