You Are Not Enough…and that’s ok

We’re getting back into the swing of things after my break from doing these weekly blogs and videos, and why not just kick things off with some tough love, right? I know in much of our society right now, especially within the wellness industry, it’s all about self-love and building up self-confidence and all that wonderful, feel-good stuff, and that’s great, but a lot of it is absolute nonsense. You can buy all kinds of books, sign up for classes, read blog posts, and watch all the videos that are nothing but trying to build you up and motivate you and make you feel good; to remind you how amazing and perfect you are.

But I’m here to tell you differently, and I’ll just go ahead and rip the bandaid off to deliver some tough love….You are not enough. You’re not.

Now, all those books, videos, courses, systems, and whatnot, those are all great when you want a little confidence boost, but really it’s just a reminder that you’re not enough. Because you’re paying someone else, using their systems, or buying their programs, or watching their videos, all for them to tell you that “you’re enough” or “you’re perfect the way you are”. Really? Then why do you need the book? Why do you watch the video? Why buy the program? You’re enough. You don’t need that person, that insight, that class; any of it. You’re just perfect the way you are, right? No. No, you’re not. I’m not. None of us are. We are human and therefore are completely fallible. We screw up, we’re naturally selfish and self-centered, and lazy. And we sure don’t know everything there is to know. That’s why you read those things, take those classes; it’s why you’re watching this video right now. Because you’re looking to someone else to show you the way in something. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. It’s actually really good.

We are built in a way that means in our minds, it’s all about us and our comfort and wanting to feel good, physically and mentally. We are biologically designed to be selfish, to avoid hardship, and to stay as comfortable as possible. We don’t want to confront our own shortcomings. This is why it’s so hard for people to improve themselves, because we first have to look at our not-so-great qualities. It’s the only way to grow, to expand our knowledge, thought processes, and actions.

According to several studies, over 50% of kids want to grow up to be famous. Not a skill, not a traditional career in the sense of a trade or degree, not offering anything to society at all; their dream is to just be famous, just because. This isn’t much different than those who come out of massage school and think, “well, I know some stuff and I’m just awesome so I’ll succeed.” Nope. No you won’t. So I’m going to go ahead and squash this right now…

You’re not going to be successful just because of who you are innately.

You are going to be successful because of what you learn, what you apply, the work you do, the skills you have, and what you can offer your clients and your community.

Much of that is going to come from you, but a lot will also come from others. You’re going to learn from others who have more experience and knowledge in certain subjects. You’ll delegate tasks to others who can take things off your shoulders and are far better equipped and capable to do them. You’ll lean on those who can support you through your trials and struggles and cheer you on when things are going well.

So drop your ego, humble yourself, and know that you are not enough, and that’s ok. Because you also have to know that there are a ton of people out there who can help shape you into someone who is more; who is more capable, who is smarter, who is stronger, who doesn’t know it all but knows that and seeks out more information and more skills, and knows when to hand something off. None of us are enough to build a business all by our lonesome. None of us are innately equipped 100% to know and do all that it takes to be successful. It takes others. It takes a community, small or large, but it does take a bit of a communal effort, if you will.

And if you don’t have that kind of support system, the kind of people who can personally and professionally teach and help and be there for you along the way, then it’s time to make the concerted effort to create that. There are amazing massage therapists and other business owners outside of the industry who you can find locally to you and those from around the world. We have an amazing Facebook group of massage therapists who are focused on building a successful massage practice. There are tons of mentors and coaches out there that you can seek out to find someone you mesh with who will push you in the right direction. And I don’t offer any kind of coaching service per se, but I am happy to help you in any way I can, so don’t hesitate to reach out; comment below, send me an email, contact me through our website, or find me on social media. I would love to be able to do anything I can to help you build and grow the massage business of your dreams.